Love the Skin you're in

There’s a lot of talk in the media news today, concerning the growing number of children apparently having cosmetic surgery for facial imperfections.
It’s been quoted that 68% of parents would gladly encourage their children to have cosmetic surgery on their faces in order to avoid bullying!

I find this revelation quite shocking and horrifying! Obviously bullying should never be tolerated. I think that goes without saying. However, surely we are pandering to the bullies and to the shallowness of our society if we send out the message to our children that they will only be accepted if they have “perfect” faces?

In my opinion, individuality of looks is something to be proud of and embraced. After all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and not obtained from a photo-fit catalogue of some shallow preconception of what is defined as uniform beauty! The world would be a truly boring and uninspirational place if we all strived to look exactly the same.

I remember an incident some 15 years ago when my eldest son was a newborn baby. I was proudly showing off my beautiful new baby in the crèche at the gym that I attended: Another mother noticed the tiny, insignificant red birthmark on his forehead, looked at me sympathetically and exclaimed, “Oh dear, you do realise that you can get that mark removed by laser treatment, don’t you? I took my son as soon as he was old enough. It only took about 4 laser sessions to correct his. I assume you’ll be taking him to your doctor to get him treated as soon as possible?” I won’t tell you what my reply was. This is a family blog, after all. Suffice to say, that the silly woman was left in no doubt as to what I thought of her unwelcome and ridiculously narrow-minded opinions!

My son’s little birthmark was, and still is, a unique feature of his beautiful face. It has faded over the years anyway and is barely even noticeable. However, it has never been an issue anyway, even if it hadn’t faded, and he has never been in any doubt as to how much we love him… and his face! Incidentally, he also walked into a door frame, as a toddler, and, although it wasn’t noticed at the time, it has left him with a nose that’s not quite as straight as it started out! However, this hasn’t spoiled his good looks either and he has absolutely no problems attracting the ladies as he matures!

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t consider surgical enhancement if your child suffers a disfiguring accident or illness. I just don’t think we should be constantly striving for a “perfection” appearance that absolutely does not exist anyway.

Look in the mirror now. Yes, go on, I dare you!

See..you are beautiful simply because you are you, and there is no one else who looks exactly like you.

You are unique. Sure, you might have a spot on the end of a nose that may have taken a knock in its time, a few wrinkles that weren’t there the last time you looked, and one eyebrow slightly higher than the other: What does that matter?

Chances are, if you are reading this now, you’re a less-than-perfect-looking mum, like me. However, you are guaranteed to have been told how beautiful you are, at least once in your life.

Remember that little miniature person who jumped on you as you crawled out of bed this morning? You probably thought you looked a wreck with your un-combed hair, bleary eyes, and pillow-creased face! Well, believe that lovely little person who gave you that slobbery kiss and blurted out “I love you Mummy, you are the most beautiful mummy in the whole universe.”

Who needs perfection?

Individuality and personal flaws are so much more interesting and endearing.

It’s the people who love the faces we were born with , that make us beautiful and perfect, anyway, and not the cosmetic surgeons.


Written by Bev.

Living with Psoriasis

Image taken from Wikipedia

I have been living with psoriasis for over 10 years now.

Psoriasis is an immune-mediated disease that affects the skin. 

It is typically a lifelong condition. There is currently no cure.

As many other
sufferers know it’s awful. It looks bad, itches and is very painful at times.
Especially now I have psoriatic arthritis.
I first got psoriasis shortly before
I fell pregnant with my first child. During my second pregnancy just over a year
later it spread all over my body. One day I remember counting 108 patches and
none were smaller than a fifty pence piece.

When my children were young my knees were constantly open wounds. The skin
rips and tears and before you know it, a simple game of crawling with your
child results in lots of blood, pain and then the prevention of infection.

Thankfully my husband couldn’t care less about my skin. But I remember
thinking on my wedding day..

"This isn’t right. This isn’t what I had planned to
look

like on my wedding day".

    

I tried every potion, lotion and medicine known. None worked.
In my third
pregnancy it all cleared up. It was wonderful. I had clear skin, not even a scar
in sight. I could play with my children and not feel pain or bleed.But soon
after he was born it all came back.

I have tried every moisturiser, and steroid cream, I've even wrapped myself in cling
film with creams on! I've tried coal tar, acupuncture, Chinese tea, diets void of sugar and
dairy, herbs, vitamins, Chinese creams, porridge, phototherapy and even taken
cyclosporine, which is an immune lowering medicine that people usually take when
having a new organ implanted.

My latest trial is going to be using borax. I’m going to drink a pinch of it
in 1 litre of water, bath in it and make a paste to cover my skin. This should
help with both my skin and the arthritis pain.
I’ll let you know how it’s going
and if I get any results. Wish me luck!

I'm embarrassed by this condition, and my children suffer the embarrassment from other
children teasing them about their mum’s skin. One boy asked my daughter why her
mum had tattooed herself red. She was very embarrassed. From that day on she asked
if I could cover myself up.
On a day out at the beach last summer, my husband convinced me to take my
cardigan off as it was very hot. I heard people comment as I walked past them,
and I'd see their faces too.
One woman said rather loudly, as I walked past her, how
disgusting my skin was and how I should cover it up! I understand how children
can be when they see something different. But adults…

Psoriasis needs awareness and people need to change the way they teach their
children how to deal with certain situations. In some cases the adults need teaching
themselves!
It’s ok to ask. That would be acceptable. How are children to learn
the appropriate way to behave if their own parents can’t?
My children know if
someone looks different that it’s not ok to stare and mock. They also know its
ok to look different.

My children have an increased chance of developing psoriasis now. The stats suggest that there is a 50% chance they will get it because of me. I’m determined to find a way to
clear my skin for their possible future too.

I would love to hear from any other sufferers.

Let me know what’s helped you, and
what hasn't.

Written by Victoria.